Frank would never be played by this person if I could choose....

Jonny Vegas		34%
Richard Madley		19%
Tom Cruise		19%
George Clooney		18%
Jason Donavon		10%

Brad would never be played by this person if I could choose....

Tim Curry		28%
Donald Sinden		24%
Jamie Theekston		18%
Elijah Wood		16%
Brad Pitt		14%

Janet would never be played by this person if I could choose....

Madonna		53%
Kylie Minogue		14%
Gwenith Paltrow		18%
A desperate housewife		10%
Susan Sarrandon!		5%

The Narrator would never be played by this person if I could choose....

Keanu Reeves		34%
Cathy Tate		24%
Ken Livingstone		15%
Patrick Stewart		14%
Jeremy Paxman		13%

Riff Raff would never be played by this person if I could choose....

Donald Trump		28%
Sean Paul		26%
Sven Goren Eriksen		24%
Pete Docharty		12%
Neil Morrisey		10%

Magenta would never be played by this person if I could choose....

Margaret Thatcher		30%
Geri Halliwell		29%
Fran Drescher		16%
Anna Friel		14%
Debbie Harry		11%

Columbia would never be played by this person if I could choose....

Victoria Beckham		50%
Bonnie Langford		18%
Anne Diamond		14%
Rosie O'Donnell		12%
Courtney Love		6%

Rocky Horror would never be played by this person if I could choose....

Tony Blair		32%
Peewee Herman		25%
Usher		20%
The Rock		17%
David Beckham		6%

Dr. Scott would never be played by this person if I could choose....

Billey Piper		38%
Albert Einstein... because he is dead.		32%
Paul McKenna		16%
Angus Deaton		14%

Eddie would never be played by this person if I could choose....

Clarrisa Dickinson-Wright		32%
Jeremy Clarkson		24%
Simon Cowell		23%
Gene Simmons		8%
Jono Coleman		3%

the Usherette would never be played by this person if I could choose....

Paris Hilton		29%
Paris Travelodge		20%
Girls Aloud		19%
Graham Norton		18%
Kate Moss		14%

The Phantoms would never be played by this person if I could choose....

Celebrity Big Brother		30%
The Crankies		24%
Westlife		23%
Actual phantoms		15%
The Arctic Monkeys		8%